I was just eating and minding my own business and Miss-Priss-I'm-an-old-ornery-witchy-lady came up and SHOVED me. She did. I almost fell over and I DID crash head first into the fridge. Seriously. I don't mean the good kind of crash into the fridge where you land in a cake, but the bad kind where you see stars. So I was just kind of trying to get my balance back and I ACCIDENTALLY pushed her and she all fell over screaming like I had beat her up. Next thing I knew she attacked my ear like a savage wild animal, ripping and tearing and almost making me bleed all over. What is a girl to do??? I had to defend myself so I screamed at her and tried to get away, but I guess it LOOKED like I was trying to eat her when really it was all self defense.
That's the true story.
Samantha the Innocent Bystander
PS It just occurred to me that there are two possible candidates for the title of Miss-Priss-I'm-an-old-ornery-witchy-lady in this house. I don't mean the spotted cow, I'm talking about the evil terrier one.