It's Roooolon-Mooch and you're not gonna believe what I'm saying. Mom took me to training the other night and I was all like OOOOH I'm gonna learn to be like James Bond 007, just call me DOUBLE-O-MOOCH. I had my Ninja skills all ready and then we got in the car with my cuzn Lehttie and I was all, what, wow, that's weird since she's a BABY and all. Then I thought maybe she was coming to watch because I'm like her hero and everything.
So then we get to this parking lot and there were all these other dogs. When we got closer I saw that these weren't just other dogs, but mostly PUPPIES. I was totally stoked, like all these whippersnappers came to watch me be 00Mooch and I was the coolest dog EVAH! I jumped out of the Tahoe and was all like, stay back till after the show and I'll give pawtographs then.
Next thing I knew the special agent trainer was talking and all the people had their dogs lined up next to these platforms. Do you see where this is going?? That's right. I was IN the class with all these PUPPIES and we were learning the SAME THINGS! It was totally humiliating and I couldn't believe my Mom would do this to me. I barely even fit on the wooden platform because it was made for BABIES not big tough Pit Bullies like ME.
I don't know why I have to be in the loser puppy class, I already know tons and tons of stuff and Mom said it's because I need to FOCUS more but if I FOCUSED anymore I'd faint. Now I have to go to this class for SIX WEEKS before I can move to the adult class and the really stinky thing is the adult class is right after the puppy one. So for the last like 10 minutes of trying to fit on that itty bitty platform the big dogs were all there watching and I know they were LAUGHING at me. I'm so embarrassed.
Nana even came to watch and she was all kissing on me after the class and telling me how proud she was of me and all those big dogs were watching. I think she even pinched my cheeks. Poor me.